Thirsty and a Fountain up the Road


Isaac grit his little teeth in that painful love that comes with a warm cat humming as it arches its body in a wave, ear to hip, along his face. The cat was his own, his pet, and he woke to find it, and he ran downstairs for it.
But that was a dream.
And so he stops before me – then runs to my ear in a loud whisper. 
I have a secret!
A soft tickle to my brain from inside a cupped hand: Mama, I need a cat. Will you buy me a cat?
And I curl away laughing; the c and the t from cat are a sensory whirl when whispered, and children are strange, so I laugh.
He sucks in a shocked inhale and slams his hand over my mouth, Don’t laugh! I had a cat. I need her. Then he cries and cries, tucking inside my lap – 
a first love lost.
Do you remember it, over and over – that wanting, how you eventually started smoking cigarettes to get used to it – puffing out O‘s just to wave your fingers through,
how you learned the mirage of flesh?

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amberhaines
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3 Comments

Seth
Reply July 24, 2008

Seriously, I am glad that we met, and married, and had babies together. Your writing is inspiring.

Who out there agrees (about the writing part that is)?

melody
Reply July 24, 2008

i agree. and i think children are right a lot of the times that they are strange. (not that you should go find him his cat right now. but that there is something right about loving a cat in a dream.)

Amber
Reply July 29, 2008

I can't believe I wrote about cats. I'm going to go buy myself a heart-shaped necklace while I'm at it.

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