a dog with that not-so-fresh feeling


WARNING! The tacky factor here is high.

ff

As usual, Seth has to let the dog out in the middle of the night. Miles bursts into night, running off the bunnies and marking the trees, while Seth sleeps on the kitchen table. They come back, Seth slinking into his covers and Miles sliding beneath my side of the bed.

I relax toward sleep and Seth into a snore, when we both sit straight up: WHAT is that Smell?!

Seth runs for the bowl of treats to lure Miles out of our room, and I fitfully chatter about how the dog has just died. I breathe through a sheet.

Miles has tangoed with a SKUNK! 

Seth puts him in the doghouse outside, and I sleep on the couch because I feel poisoned. 

Next morning, I call the vet and ask what to do. The receptionist puts me on hold, goes to ask the doctor, and comes back matter-of-factly saying, “The Doctor says to use Massengill Douche. Good Luck.” 

So, yes, I go to the grocery store as mortified as the first time I bought tampons. I go through the self checkout line. I sit them on the kitchen table, and my company and I giggle for hours, making 8th-grade boy jokes and imagining how Seth is going to take the news. “Oh Babe, here’s the douche the vet said you have to use on the dog.” 

this is embarrassingSo my brave man does it, gagging all the while, squirting each bottle of powdery vinegar solution on the the dog’s skunky hair, and I, of course, because I am a blogger, took pictures, which within itself is funny. 

deskunkify with douche Just So You KnowLeave the permalink to your funny post for the week in MckLinky, or tell us a story in the comments . Spread the laughter or at least a grin, and tell us about your funniest memories, old or new. Use the button in the sidebar or link back to this post to spread the love. Come back and check out the other links, too. From now on, I’m calling this a contest. The funniest story gets a LINK SPOTLIGHT in my next Funnies post. Thank you for laughing with me. 

Last Week’s winner is …… Love Well with I Think I’d Rather Be Called a Hippie

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About me

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15 Comments

songbirdtiff
Reply September 11, 2009

Oh my gosh! That's hilarious. I'm surprised your vet didn't tell you to use tomato juice. Do you suppose he just wanted you to buy the MOST embarrassing thing ever? :)

Kelly @ Love Well
Reply September 11, 2009

Somewhere, there's a vet laughing.

I've always heard tomato juice, too.

(Thanks for the winning link from last week, by the way. My husband is so honored.)

Jo@Mylestones
Reply September 11, 2009

Something tells me Seth might not be ready to laugh about this one just yet. And I gotta wonder if that vet of yours was having a Friday Funnies/ Punked episode of his own!
What ever did we do before blogs, when this sort of thing happened and we couldn't say "well....at least it'll make a good blog post!" My funny for the week is most definitely that sort of story....(and days later I'm still finding aquaphor in the most random places in her room....)

melissa
Reply September 11, 2009

is that a schnauzer? we have had 3 schnauzers and they are such dogs! (couldn't think of a better word). they have a certain personality don't they? we finally kicked our last one out of the house and she's an outdoor dog now. i've never been so happy.

dawn
Reply September 11, 2009

that is hysterical--love it!

Heidi
Reply September 11, 2009

I love that you got the equate version... I mean, lets not get the brand name douche for the dog! lol

mine this week is short and sweet, enjoy
http://benandheidiclark.blogspot.com/2009/09/bad-mom-good-mom.html

L.L. Barkat
Reply September 11, 2009

thank goodness you're a blogger. i needed that laugh. :)

Tracy
Reply September 11, 2009

Ok, I think that I like you more. I grew up on a ranch and they always told us to bath them in tomato juice. That information is so much less interesting than your vet's advice, though.

The memory is worth having to spell out all of those miserable words.

Alabama Emily
Reply September 11, 2009

I am not a member of Twitter but after looking around on your blog I clicked to "Follow You on Twitter". I read your tweet about worrying that you lost readers today. Today is the first day I have read your blog and you absolutely gained a reader in me! You have touched my heart by all of your candid blogs that have already made me laugh and cry. Thanks for your transparency. BTW, I am a childhood friend of Erin's, from Claysville and DAR days :)

    Amber
    Reply September 11, 2009

    I know exactly who you are. Wow. I've known you longer than everybody in this bloggy land. Thank you, Alabama Emily.

Malia
Reply September 11, 2009

Funny AND informative. Now I know what to do if my dog ever tangos with a skunk!

Laurie
Reply September 11, 2009

Our Golden Retriever, Gunner, has been sprayed twice by skunks - once on a camping trip on the Buffalo - right outside of our tent and the other time in our own backyard. The best remedy I found is 1 quart 3% hydrogen peroxide, 1/4 cup baking soda mixed with 1 tsp. liquid dish soap. Not only does it help the smell but makes his hair is silky, smooth! LOL

Just wish I could have let him drink the mixture since the poor dog had been sprayed directly into his mouth.

Jana
Reply September 11, 2009

Once a skunk sprayed our dog (also a schnauzer) who was standing in front of the air conditioning unit outside. The smell was circulated through the entire house and was very hard to get out. Eventually, my nose grew sensitized to the smell, and I didn't realize how funky I was until the next night at church. I had brought the stink into the house of God and no one would sit by me.

Lisa @ Crazy Adventures in Parenting
Reply September 12, 2009

Douche, really? Hmm. Good to know *makes mental note* We had an unholy experience with a skunk and a raccoon having a battle underneath the crawl space of my bedroom in this one house we lived in as a child. There wasn't enough tomato juice and essential oils to get rid of that smell.

Renae Williford
Reply December 17, 2009

Thanks for the laugh, this is HIGH-larious!!!

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