What I Wore Wednesday: in the blue


I wear the clothes that I’ve really always liked – just the less frenzied version. Style now is such a blending of the 70’s – a style I borrowed in my teens, the 80’s – a style I longed for in the gangly years, and the 90’s – a style I can’t help. I am certainly a child of the 90’s.

Back then:

Around the time that Cobain breaks my heart and dies, just right as I discover him, right as I light candles in my shut room and fill notebooks with my scribbled longhand, I think Forever is now with my love. I write misunderstood ten thousand ways.

I wear the blue, taste smoke, want lost in the woods to find the place I carved my name decades ago. I want to still have the knife that carved our names. But I’m only 15. Don’t call me fake. I can mix a tape that makes you want to kiss me until the sun comes up.

I can walk a long dirt road in the black of night – feel intimate with coyotes’ breath.

***

We grow up. I still believe that Forever Love is now. I’m a believer. I have given names to children.

I find my clothes in the dirty pile, and I wash them, and sometimes I put them away.

I’ve gotten better at only keeping what fits, quieter now, buy what wears long.

God finally looks ancient. Silent in the bathroom mirror, I wear blue.

I remember being alone, a different kind of blue, the coyotes’ call.

 

linking to the cool kids: her and her.

 

amberhaines
About me

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9 Comments

Megan at SortaCrunchy
Reply September 7, 2011

Beatles and bells. Love love love.

Child of the 90s here, too. I know those angsty journals and I know being 15 and not a fake. I can relate in so, so many ways.

The way you fill every space with poetry is the kind of art and inspiration I long for today. Each day. Thank you for being a tangible reminder of His creativity and His unique and His ancient.

Adventures In Babywearing
Reply September 7, 2011

Love love love. That's me, too. I grew up in the 80's but really grew as a person in the 90's.

Steph

Arianne
Reply September 7, 2011

I woke today thinking about that oldness. Ancient of Days inside me. The only One in existence that can actually birth with me, share the task.

I love that Africa is on your mirror...

<3

Amy
Reply September 7, 2011

Ah yes...I remember being a child of the 90s. Good, if sometimes angsty, memories. Love that scarf in the second picture!

Seth
Reply September 7, 2011

You are hot.

There, I said it.

Cassi
Reply September 7, 2011

Love the shades of blue and green in the scarf.

Corinne
Reply September 7, 2011

Every now and then I long for youth, those days of being misunderstood. And then I don't... but they were good to have... :)

Brandee
Reply September 7, 2011

I think you look downright amazing considering the size of the baby bump just a few posts back.

amy turn sharp
Reply September 8, 2011

I love you. and this. xo

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