on Safe Places
“If my fear happens, then I won’t make it.” This is how I threaten God.
It’s been a year of being shaken out of my safe places, as an ant from an ant collection.
I’ve left deep claw marks in some invisible places: in the marriages of people I love, in the number that shows when I step on the scale, in my health, my friendships, and especially in my plan (an Ethiopian adoption that I thought would have begun last Spring).
As for me, I said in my prosperity,
“I shall never be moved.”
By your favor, O LORD,
you made my mountain stand strong;
you hid your face;
I was dismayed [in other words, shaken]. (Psalm 30: 6-7)
I’ve been shaken just enough to cling harder to what inevitably fails. I have been so disappointed, shaken enough to give up and let go, enough to wake from a daze and see that God carries, which is the humility I asked for,
which is the peace I asked for,
which is the rest I needed,
in the One and Only true Safe Place.
Resolution #7: I will pray to never be shaken. God will never be shaken.