No Goodbye


Today I sit at a table with friends who are moving to the other side of this globe, and I sit and reel. At this coffee shop, they are known. People walk by and put hands on their shoulders, to touch the body, the unreal glory of tents.

They move away, and yet spirit makes them just as close. This body, this tapestry with the Lover, the Weaver.

We are close and we pray. There are no goodbyes. All, so much, is unknown, the brokenness up ahead, the scales falling off the scales of all our eyes.

How much have we said lately that it’s worth it, the gospel? That there’s nothing we can do.

Coffee cups and plastic lids and Mac laptops. Somewhat hipster academic hippy edges, our winter scarves, the fox and owl trends all around. They hold hands and make eyes, like a big wave is coming, and they’re about to ride. I see the elder’s eyes glisten, proud. Ah, I know the curtain is split. We are alive in eternity, in this room with GOD, sometimes like a fed-flower in the crack of a rock. We are more than stars and sand.

We sit here across the world and one with those in secret churches, the lonely pleading in special-needs cribs. We are one with the jailed, the worked-down-to-the-bone, out on the sands of deserts and in the highlands with Nomads and their livestock. We cry, all of us, hush the rocks.

They go, and all is grace. Nothing they can do. We only know what we’ve been told. So they go, and we send. Hallelujah.


Say a prayer for my friends?

And also see in my sidebar? That playlist of music? You can hear their hearts there. Gorgeous. Check it out!

About me


When There’s a Lion in Your Yard
November 18, 2016
What do you taste?
November 08, 2016
When You’re Not the Fixer
October 24, 2015
When The Church Doesn’t Fit Or Fix You: a Wild in the Hollow Guest Post from Christie Purifoy
October 12, 2015
The Hurt and the Healing: A Wild in the Hollow Guest Post by Bonnie King
September 30, 2015
Will They Stay if You Change?
September 28, 2015
Wild in the Hollow Book Club Video: Chapters 1 and 2
September 14, 2015
A Mud Stories Podcast on Sex, Shame, Unforgiveness, and the Church
August 06, 2015
Church couldn’t help me with it anymore.
August 03, 2015


Reply February 15, 2012

We're out on the sands with the Nomads... if only...

I really loved this Amber. It's time for more of this.

Reply February 15, 2012

Only you can do this.

Cathy Monetti
Reply February 15, 2012

I will read this a thousand times, and then a thousand more.

Blessings to you and to your friends.

Caroline Starr Rose
Reply February 16, 2012

There really is no separating those in His hand (though I know how much it hurts in the now). Blessings to you and your friends.

Darcy @ Message in a Mason Jar
Reply February 16, 2012

I've gone and I've sent, so this resonates. Beautiful music your friends are making. And beautiful words you're writing..."like a fed-flower in the crack of a rock".

Addie Zierman
Reply February 16, 2012


diana trautwein
Reply February 16, 2012

Ah, yes, "We ARE more than stars and sand..." Prayers for your friends, wherever they are going, whatever they are doing, that they may carry your love and God's with them into every crevice of this new life.

Reply February 16, 2012

I just discovered your blog a couple of weeks ago. Thank you for writing. Your words remind me of the essays in Teaching a Stone to Talk by Annie Dillard. Beautiful. I look forward to following your journey.

imperfect prose
Reply February 16, 2012

your heart is so big, amber. love you.

Reply February 17, 2012

coming over here from deb's place, this morning. your words made me weep. and rejoice, too, somehow...

" Ah, I know the curtain is split. We are alive in eternity, in this room with GOD, sometimes like a fed-flower in the crack of a rock. "

may your friends know His presence as they go forth, and may they also know the presence, through His spirit, of all of you, with them.

Amy @ themessymiddle
Reply February 19, 2012

As one who lives on the other side of the world, I find it doesn't get easier with time. It did in the short run, but over the years, it hasn't. But, God has faithfully gone before, besides, and behind all of the coming and going!

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