When God Inhabits Praise
In cycles of surviving and waiting and hiding, I bought The Divine Hours like one completely unaccustomed to liturgy. This morning, one of my four was laying in the hallway crying, hardly made it out of his room, because he dreads school. As soon as I saw him I knew exactly and thought to myself how motherhood can feel much the same, though it shouldn’t. I scooped him to my lap, just us on the bed, and read the morning prayer, all praise and “glory” again and again, asking for a new song. There’s something about praying scripture out loud over your house and to your house, confessing a Holy Other and our desire to keep to that which He has called us. Even in rebellion and the desire to give up, my little one couldn’t deny peace. And neither could I.
Seth is home and wouldn’t you know it that 24 hours later, I finally got that tummy bug and barfed all night long. It’s a beautiful life. I feel like I’ve hardly taken him in, but before he had to shave his beard this morning for court, I snuzzled it good. It was just so soft. Okay, I’ll stop.
His time with Kidmia in Ethiopia was amazing. I hope you’ll read his posts about it because what they do there is real and different and his eyes have witnessed it twice. The first time he went to Africa was to Mozambique, and that trip actually wrecked us, in a good and terrible way. But after these years, the visits to Ethiopia have bolstered us. Brothers and sisters there send him home in peace. Last time they also sent him home with a parasite, but this time, I’m pretty sure he just came home with a great sense that the global church is actively engaged in telling some good news to the poor. Jesus still goes to the blind, friends. He still comes as a small child leading his mother to market. Don’t give up.
It’s just a regular Monday. The world over are strings and tambourines. Rivers turn solid ground beneath beasts. Flowers bloom and dance. Dew flashes, and snowflakes form uniquely, altogether new, by the millions of billions. We are new creations all the time. Our faith isn’t yet supposed to be made to be sight.
Cry out, you souls. Cry out your Hosannas until you can see Him with your very real eyes.
- January 13, 2014
- 16 Comments
- 0
- Hope
Diana Trautwein
January 13, 2014Ah, yes. Praying peace over our children and ourselves, welcoming daddy home, remembering we belong to one another - even when we've been barfing all night long. Hope you feel 100% soon. In the meantime, keep writing like this, okay??
Amber
January 13, 2014Okay. :) We Haines people really do love you, Diana.
Rachel Franklin
January 13, 2014Indeed, Amber. I hope you are healing quickly.
Kaitlin Curtice
January 13, 2014Amen and Amen. Love you.
carissa
January 13, 2014I can't even explain what your words do for me, not adequately. My soul just finds a connection or two or a thousand and suddenly breathing comes a little easierand I have no idea why. Thank you for being brave enough to write your soul out.
Amber
January 13, 2014Thank you for encouraging me like this Carissa.
Warren Baldwin
January 13, 2014About the book you referenced ... I just took a spiritual formation class. Had many readings similar to what I sense this book may be about. When praise and gratitude are allowed, even welcomed, into the daily routine of life, it is transforming. Good post. And welcome back to Seth.
Tara Livesay
January 13, 2014Beautiful (not the barfing - but the rest of it). Please feel better soon, friend! Glad your guy is back with you.
Amber
January 13, 2014Thank you, friend. I'm glad you got to be back home, too.
Tara Owens
January 13, 2014"We are new creations all the time."
Oh, how I needed to hear this today. Thank you.
And praying for recovery for you. Stomach bugs are ucky.
Seth
January 13, 2014You are one amazing woman, see.
The way you use the word "barfing" in a post? It is strangely marvelous.
Fiona
January 13, 2014Your words are like a hot cup of tea for the soul. Soothing. Refreshing. I'm so thankful we are new creations all the time. xxx
Annie Barnett
January 13, 2014I'm always happy to find your words here, Amber. Deep sigh. Hope everyone is feeling better soon.
Robin Troxell
January 14, 2014"Our faith isn’t yet supposed to be made to be sight." - ouch. but yes. Hoping you are feeling better so very soon. Motherhood is a tough gig when you are well much less puking your guts out. hugs.
Babs C.
January 14, 2014Raw truth, Pure Beauty, Complete Honesty. Thank you for being totally real. I always enjoy reading what you write and encourage you to know that you are beautiful inside and out. The words you dare to share prove it over and over. Bravo. Now don't worry about the out-of-sorts thoughts or the times the words that blurt out of your mouth "live" somehow telling a different story. They don't. You know they don't because your heart's response is to care, remorse over a word you'd prefer to have left unsaid, and screams to God to help you be "better". You are "better" just as you are with open heart toward God, pouring forth His praise and seeking Him to be prominent in your home, life, and each day. I hope you have recovered from the stomach bug and enjoy some more snuggling, even if the beard is gone now.